Thursday, December 11, 2008

Dance Dance Party Party Awesome Awesome

Want to dance but hate clubs that are filled with smoke and men just looking to get laid? Check out Dance Dance Party Party, which is a 80 minute, judgment free, woman-only, alcohol-free dance zone.

In an article in the Twin Cities Daily Planet, Den mother of the Minneapolis chapter (there are groups in cities all across the country) Megan Krejny explains it like this:

“Most importantly, there is no judgment. You are not allowed to judge the fellow dancers and most of all, you aren’t allowed to judge yourself. Also—there is no talking. I know, you want to dance and talk to your friends, but believe me, it’s for the best.”
How awesome is that? I really wish there was a chapter where I live... if anything I'll have to wait until I move back to the M-SP.

Personally, I'll take Dance Dance Party Party as a woman-friendly dance workout over those pole dancing classes some places offer.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Adoption as a feminist issue - the right to mother?

There's a great article on adoption in the Twin Cities Daily Planet today written by Korean adoptee Katie Leo:

I am part of a growing number of adult adoptees who view adoption as a feminist issue, part of a continuum of reproductive rights. This perspective extends to the right to raise one’s child the same importance as the right to choose whether or not to bear one.

...

As a woman dealing with the pain of my own infertility, I did not want to think through all these questions when I first considered adopting a child. Frankly, I just wanted to be a mother. My decision not to adopt after realizing that adoption was in conflict with my political beliefs is my personal choice. I do not condemn all adoptive parents, my own included, whom I love profoundly. Nor do I condemn adoption across the board. I do think, however, that we need to reframe our discussion of adoption. And though this story is about international adoption, I believe this discussion should include domestic adoption and foster care.

I believe that if the spirit of feminism creates solidarity between women across social, economic and racial barriers, feminists should work to remove the obstacles that render women around the globe so powerless, rather than using their situations as a reason to take their children from them. We should also question adoption language that carries implicit judgments of who makes a legitimate mother. Other issues to address are using children as a commodity, and racial coding of mothers and children. And we should work toward the extension of reproductive rights to include the rights of women to raise their children.

Check it out.

Ed Rendell knows what's sexist and what's not, apparently

Hey, Governor Ed Rendell, just because you don't think something is sexist doesn't mean it's not sexist.

Remember how earlier in the week he called the appointment of Arizona Governor Janet Napolitano as head of the Homeland Security Department perfect because she has no family and thus no life?

Although he sent her a note apologizing for any personal discomfort, he still stands by his statement, saying it's "100% true."

Rendell added, "I think she's the gold standard for governors. She works hard, she's dedicated, she's focused."

Well then, he should have said that as opposed to: "Janet's perfect for that job. Because for that job [head of Homeland Security], you have to have no life. Janet has no family. Perfect. She can devote, literally, 19-20 hours a day to it."

Big difference, especially considering the way that single women are perceived in our society... Old Cat Lady stereotype, anyone?

It's not Rendell's position to determine if his statement was sexist or not - he needs to step back from his privileged status and let other people have their own opinions on what he said, just like Campbell Brown did.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Get it outta me!: my feminist dreams

Last night I had a dream that my brother was trying to get me to stop doing something... I don't remember it completely, but we physically fought and I was mad that he was trying to tell me what to do. I was so angry in my dream and I even woke up angry. I had to tell myself that it wasn't something that he actually did, just a byproduct of my subconscious and that I had no reason to be so mad at him.

I think some part of me is afraid that at some point, someone (some man), a person I trust and whose opinion matters to me, will try to tell me that I can't do something or that I shouldn't try for my goals. I don't think my brother is the type of person to tell me what to do with my life, but he just happened to stand in for that role in my dream.

I've had other feminist-related dreams before... most specifically last year I was reading Cunt and fell asleep for a nap. I dreamed that the patriarchy was inside me, as in physically inside my body cavity, so I started tearing at my body trying to get it out while yelling, "GET IT OUTTA ME!"

My dreams are always a little weird... but I'm always glad to see when they have a feminist twist.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

No family doesn't equal no life

CNN's Campbell Brown is right on the money again. After a comment from Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell saying Janet Napolitano (Obama's pick for head of Homeland Security Department) would be a good choice because she has no family and thus, no life.

Brown says this:

Wow. Now, I'm sure Gov. Napolitano has many qualifications for the job beyond having no family, and therefore the ability to devote 20 hours a day to the job.

But it is fascinating to me that that is the quality being highlighted here as so perfect. C'mon. Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff is married with two grown children. His predecessor, Tom Ridge, had a family. Anybody remember a debate about whether they would have trouble balancing the demands of work and family?

Now, I am a fan of Gov. Rendell. He has been on this show many times. I like him for his candor. In our attempts to cut through the bull, he delivers far less bull than most politicians. But it is his frankness here that raises so many questions.

1. If a man had been Obama's choice for the job, would having a family or not having a family ever even have been an issue? Would it have ever prompted a comment? Probably not. We all know the assumption tends to be that with a man, there is almost always a wife in the wings managing those family concerns.

2. As a woman, hearing this, it is hard not to wonder if we are counted out for certain jobs, certain opportunities, because we do have a family or because we are in our child-bearing years. Are we? It is a fair question.

3. If you are a childless, single woman with suspicions that you get stuck working holidays, weekends and the more burdensome shifts more often than your colleagues with families, are those suspicions well-founded? Probably so. Is there an assumption that if you're family-free then you have no life? By some, yes.

Again Gov. Rendell, I don't mean to rake you over the coals. I know what you meant to say. But your comments do perpetuate stereotypes that put us in boxes, both mothers and single women.

In government and beyond, men have been given the benefit of the doubt when it comes to striking the right work-life balance. Women are owed the same consideration.


Right on the money. I've really appreciated Brown's commentary over the past few months... it's been a long time since I've enjoyed someone in the mainstream media, and Brown offers us a supportive voice.

Monday, December 1, 2008

World AIDS Day - get tested for free!

In honor of World AIDS day, get tested! You can find a location through the National HIV and STD Testing Resources or if you're in the Twin Cities you can go to the Family Tree Clinic for a free test, located on Marshall and Fry in St. Paul.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Rape culture and Christmas songs

If you participate in Christmas, you should be glad to know that our rape culture even extends to Christmas songs:



I really can't stay - Baby it's cold outside
I've got to go away - Baby it's cold outside
This evening has been - Been hoping that you'd drop in
So very nice - I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice
My mother will start to worry - Beautiful, what's your hurry
My father will be pacing the floor - Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I'd better scurry - Beautiful, please don't hurry
well Maybe just a half a drink more - Put some music on while I pour

The neighbors might think - Baby, it's bad out there
Say, what's in this drink - No cabs to be had out there
I wish I knew how - Your eyes are like starlight now
To break this spell - I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell
I ought to say no, no, no, sir - Mind if I move a little closer
At least I'm gonna say that I tried - What's the sense in hurting my pride
I really can't stay - Baby don't hold out
Ahh, but it's cold outside

C'mon baby

I simply must go - Baby, it's cold outside
The answer is no - Ooh baby, it's cold outside
This welcome has been - I'm lucky that you dropped in
So nice and warm -- Look out the window at that storm
My sister will be suspicious - Man, your lips look so delicious
My brother will be there at the door - Waves upon a tropical shore
My maiden aunt's mind is vicious - Gosh your lips look delicious
Well maybe just a half a drink more - Never such a blizzard before

I've got to go home - Oh, baby, you'll freeze out there
Say, lend me your comb - It's up to your knees out there
You've really been grand - Your eyes are like starlight now
But don't you see - How can you do this thing to me
There's bound to be talk tomorrow - Making my life long sorrow
At least there will be plenty implied - If you caught pneumonia and died
I really can't stay - Get over that old out
Ahh, but it's cold outside

Baby it's cold outside

Brr its cold….
It's cold out there
Cant you stay awhile longer baby
Well…..I really shouldn't...alright

Make it worth your while baby
Ahh, do that again….
Ah, nothing gets me in the Christmas mood like coercion, intentionally getting someone drunk for the purpose of sex, the idea that not wanting to have sex hurts a man's pride, female purity that needs to be protect by family members, slut-shaming by the community and date rape all immortalized in holiday song and cheer.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Thanksgiving Playlist

As I head back to the Midwest for Thanksgiving, this is the playlist on my iPod (hopefully one of those new nanos after Christmas, hint hint):

Phenomena, Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Right Back Where We Started From, Maxine Nightingale
Suddenly I See, KT Tunstall
You're So Vain, Carly Simon
The First Cut Is The Deepest, Cat Stevens
New Soul, Yael Naim
You Are the Best Thing, Ray LaMontagne
Seven Nation Army, Nostalgia 77
Helter Skelter, Dana Fuchs, Across the Universe soundtrack
Traffic Light, Ting Tings
Black Water, Doobie Brothers
Please Please Please, Fiona Apple


Have a great Thanksgiving, Americans! Have a nice Thursday everyone else!

Thursday, November 20, 2008

WhiteKnot.org

Some people decided marriage equality deserved it's own symbol, thus: whiteknot.org.

Much like awareness ribbons, the White Knot symbolizes the ability for everyone to get married, regardless of gender of partner. They've mixed two traditionally American symbols of marriage - tying the knot and the color white - to visually support marriage equality.


Erica of swirlspice and cinna.mn says,

That’s cool and all. I get where they’re coming from. But who decided this? A bunch of white guys in West Hollywood? Because there are lots of marriage traditions out there and this seems like an awfully white-culture-centric choice of symbol.

I’d still wear one, though.

She's got a good point - it's representative of White American marriage culture, which is reflected in the very symbol they chose. But like colored ribbons or those plastic blank-strong bracelets, they're a very visible sign of support for marriage equality.

I'd wear one too.

Tool purse? Seriously?

What's wrong with this headline:

Astronaunt Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper loses her tool purse in space

She's an astronaunt - respect her position if you can't respect her. Jeeze.

Thanks to Kari for the heads up.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Transgendered hate on talk radio

Chris Baker, a conservative talk radio host on KTLK 100.3 out of Minneapolis, has repeatedly said hateful things including, but not limited to:
Regarding the recent murder of Latiesha Green, a trans woman, on his November 18 show, Baker said:

Second of all, I believe that the fault, and I know, 'cause already I'm seeing quotes and comments and, "Oh, it's hate. It's a hate crime. It's a horrible hate crime." Doesn't some of the blame lie with the American media who enables this fraud? Doesn't some of the blame -- I would say a majority of the blame does not lie with the nitwit that shot him, other than the fact that he's a nitwit and a guy who should have been in prison in my opinion, who shot him. But to me, this is the -- this is an example of how, by enabling people and trying to push this false reality, leads to horrible crimes like this, by -- by telling people, "Oh, well, you know, he -- did he [Thomas Beattie] get pregnant?"

...

So annoying for me, but there's a story today, it's a very -- it's a horrible story from Syracuse, New York. A guy's been charged with murder after he shot two people last week. One of them was a transgender person. So, now, they're talking about hate crime charges, things like that. Look, this guy is a murderer and should go to jail. This guy should be punished to the fullest extent of the law.

But I personally believe that by the media and all these other people out there enabling these people that they put people like this at risk, because they give them the boldness, the confidence, the -- to decide, "Well, you know what? I'm a girl. Even though I'm not a girl, I'm a girl. And the media will call me a girl, so, therefore, I can walk into any party I want. I can go anywhere I want. I can demand whatever I want and no one can stop me because the media is going to call me a girl."

Well, guess what? In my opinion, other than the fact that the guy that allegedly murdered this guy -- and this guy I'm talking about would be the transgender guy. I promise I'm just getting this off my chest. This is just driving me nuts.

I believe the media and the rest of the enablers out there, they have this guy's blood on their hands because they create this false sense of reality and they enable people who need serious psychological counseling. I mean, what guy in his right mind would have his stuff cut off? Now, there's a lot of women in their right mind that would like to do that to a guy, but what guy in his right mind wants to have his stuff cut off? What woman in her right mind wants to have her breasts removed? I mean, do they notice the millions of dollars women spend every year in this country to get bigger ones?

This whole thing is -- it's just infuriating to me. You know why? Because I gotta explain this to my kids.

You know what's infuriating to me? I'm going to have to explain people like you to my kids one day. I'm going to have to explain why some people are so hateful to people they don't even know just because of who they are.

Because people like Thomas Beattie and Lateisha Green were trying to find some happiness in their lives.

Because Sarah Palin and Nancy Pelosi had the audacity to be women in political office.

Because WNBA players want the same respect as male professional baseketball players.

Because citizens of this country wanted to show their dissent for an ideology of fear and restricting rights.

I'm going to have to tell my kids that it doesn't matter what they do in life, people are going to judge them simply on who they love or if they play basketball or if they have the ambition to serve our country in political office or if they just show up to voice their dissent.

And that's infuriating to me.



If you'd like to share some of your thoughts with Chris Baker or any of the other people at 100.3 KTLK, feel free here or at chrisbaker@ktlkfm.com.

h/t to Minnesota Independent and Media Matters for links

Monday, November 17, 2008

"I showed her the closets"



Laura Bush, you are not helping with the whole fashion is not news thing.

Thanks to Michael for the link.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Tilly and the Wall revisited

I've written of my Tilly and the Wall love before, but Tilly on Sesame Street? Awesome.


Tilly & the Wall on SESAME STREET from Team Love on Vimeo.

Have a good weekend.

Fashion is STILL not political news

Aw, hell no.

Slate has up an article today titled: Fashion advice for Michelle Obama, with slideshow.

We've been over this before. Fashion and hairstyles are not political news. If you're covering a fashion designer's new winter line, then yes. That's news. But if you're offering your "advice" to someone who doesn't make a career in fashion, then it's not. It's just ridiculous and sexist.

Michelle Obama is an intelligent, passionate, hard-working woman who doesn't need someone writing about her clothing choices. I think the only person who should be critiquing her wardrobe is her stylist, and I'm almost certain that person wouldn't be writing about it for Slate.

So one more time with me: Fashion is not political news, or almost any news in general.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

My feminist awakening and the Global Gag Rule

Word has it that President-Elect Obama plans to rescind the Global Gag Rule as soon as he takes office, which is awesome. I'm particularly glad to hear this, and hope it happens immediately. Women all over the world are hurting because of the Gag Rule, and they don't need one more day of conservative politics on their bodies.

I have a special affinity for the issue of the Gag Rule, one that's wrapped up in my feminist-coming-of-age story.

Growing up, my parents weren't particularly outspoken regarding politics; I knew my parents voted Republican but I never really knew why and didn't really care. In my high school civics class, I took a survey on various political positions and was a little surprised to see my viewpoints were decidedly liberal and I was closely aligned with the Democratic party - although now I think I was just surprised because I assumed I'd have Republican leanings as opposed to being surprised based on policies.

When I went off to college, I became more politically aware, but not active. Aware, but on a distant level where it was all theoretical. One day, my friend invited me to an informational meeting about the March for Women's Lives in 2004. I went and signed up, but it was all so ... abstract. I didn't quite realize exactly what was at stake and how large of a march it was until we got there and literally, my world changed.

We took a 30 hour bus ride from St. Paul, MN to Washington D.C. My friend and I couldn't afford a hotel room, so we contacted students at Georgetown and we ended up staying at another student's house on their floor with other marchers. They were radical lesbians and really fun, given that we were awkward college freshman from the midwest... Also my first introduction to The L Word was a poster in their bathroom, but my love for The L Word is another story.

The March was amazing and life changing and still to this day, when I found out my current roommate was also at the March, we hugged. Never before had I been surrounded by so many people passionate about what they believed in, and fighting for sovereignty of their own bodies. I was afraid to tell my parents that I was going to the March, believing that their politics and religion would disapprove and they'd be disappointed in me. I waited until I was on the bus to tell them I was going (not that I thought they'd stop me... just that I put it off as long as possible), but my expectations and fears were unfounded. Instead of disappointment, my mom was proud of what I was doing (although she thought staying with strangers in DC was a little sketchy) and the experience opened up discussions on my family's history between my mom, sister and I. Looking back, I only wish they could have been there with me, but I'm sure there will be many opportunities in the future.

After a virus attacked my computer junior year of college, I lost a bunch of my photos. They might be on discs somewhere, but I'm not holding out hope for those. This blurry picture-of-a-pictures might be the only picture I have of my roommates and I at the March for Women's Lives. I didn't have a sweatshirt and I was kinda cold.

After returning from the trip, I ditched my paper topic for my Model United Nations class and instead opted to write on the Global Gag Rule and its impact in Africa. Here's my closing paragraphs from my paper (be kind... I was 18 when I wrote this):

The most obvious solution is to revoke the Global Gag Rule immediately, restoring funding to cut programs like the International Planned Parenthood Foundation and allowing other NGOs to speak freely on reproductive health choices. The Global Gag Rule doesn’t affect the level of abortions because it doesn’t affect the occurrence of unwanted pregnancies. It only forces clinics that offer education on family planning and reproductive health to discontinue services, and in drastic cases but not uncommon, to close. The Gag Rule “causes more unwanted pregnancies, more unsafe abortions, and arguably, more deaths” (The Global Gag Rule: Putting Politics Before Public Health, 2004). The Global Gag Rule is one flounced by pro-life politicians, but in all reality is as anti-life as possible. This rule demeans women and puts the personal choice of reproductive health into the hands of male politicians on a different continent, thousands of miles away.

While many NGOs are cutting back on reproductive health services in order to keep US funding, several have denied US backing in order to continue informing women, men and couples on contraceptives, family planning and safe abortions.
Supporting these programs is the best way to directly help and influence the reproductive freedom of people in other countries.

The likelihood of the Gag Rule being revoked before November 2004 is incredibly slim, considering the current state of affairs.
Hopefully in January 2005 the new president will attend to this matter, but until then there’s still things that can be done. Contacting your state representatives and voicing your opinion is an option that applies to all issues concerning citizens, and works well in this situation as well. Raising public awareness of Bush’s war against women not only increases your commitment to seeing change, but also impassions other individuals who feel strongly about it as well. The influence of the Internet is a major force in politics these days, as seen in the rise and fall of Howard Dean. There are groups that you can get in contact with, and if none suit your specific needs, create a group. Most importantly, all citizens need to go out and vote in the presidential election. If you don’t vote, then you don’t have a right to complain about the state of affairs. Being a concerned citizen involves taking an active part in shaping and molding how the future of the United States looks.

In President Bush’s State of the Union address, he singled out Africa as a primary place for receiving HIV/AIDS education and drugs.
Sadly, Africa is also the place where the global gag rule devastatingly impacts the hardest, causing hundreds of people to die from being denied the basic human right of family planning and access to education and information. The level of unintended pregnancy is lowest in countries with greatest access to effective methods of contraception and where women play a major role in family decision-making (Family Planning: A Human Right). In an effort to influence the entire world and push one faction’s ideals, the United States has managed to alienate itself and anger many people, domestic and foreign alike. The current status quo is unacceptable, and the statistics are overwhelmingly tragic. The Mexico City Policy needs to be revoked as soon as possible, in order to free the world from this gag rule implemented by conservatives whose idea of sex education is no education. Women and children are dying from the effects of this “pro-life” policy, and that must be stopped immediately.
It's a little odd to read something I wrote five years ago, but the opinions I expressed there haven't changed. I might cringe at some of the phrases and bright-eyed optimism, but since I wrote that, things have gotten worse. The Bush administration has cast a eight-year shadow over the world, slashing funding for groups that even discuss women's health, all in the name of religious and moral absolutes.

For the past eight years the Global Gag Rule has stood as a reminder of my feminist awakening and my ever present awareness that as a privileged nation, the United States isn't doing enough for our sisters suffering in this world. To finally see it written out of law will be a good day indeed.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Protest Prop 8 on November 15

People all across the country will be protesting California's passage of Proposition 8 banning marriage equality this Saturday, November 15. Congregate at your town hall at 10:30 PST/1:30 EST and show the United States that we won't stand for institutionalized hate and inequality.

Join the Impact is the main site for organizing and disseminating information regarding Saturday's protests. You can find information there about how to locate your nearest protest or organize your own. Queers United has a collection of other protests, lots in California and for you Minnesotans, at the Capital in St. Paul on Tuesday, November 11 at 3:30.

If the events of the past week have shown us anything, we can make a change, so let's work towards marriage equality and striking down the hate inherent in Prop 8.